When parents are unable to provide children with adequate attention and nurturing (because of the amount of time spent gambling), children can feel abandoned - both physically and emotionally. They may become angry or depressed and may begin acting out. Children may also blame themselves for the problems in the home. This added stress can cause children to withdraw or act out their confusion in inappropriate ways. Children need to be made aware of the problem with age-appropriate information about problem gambling.
The key messages children need to hear are:
| 1) | There is a problem but the adults are addressing it. |
| 2) | It is not their fault and they are not responsible for fixing the problem. |
| 3) | They can feel better by talking about their feelings and making healthy choices. |
| 4) | Treatment for their parent is available and effective. |
Parents can also help their children by spending more time with them. Children need to feel safe and secure, and by establishing daily routines and weekly activities, children will feel a healthy sense of structure and consistency in their lives. Making sure that children also have "safe" people to talk to can help them feel better about what is going on at home. Depending on the age of the children, it may be appropriate to discuss any lifestyle changes that will affect them; however, you must reinforce the message that they do not need to "worry" about financial concerns.
Children may be confused about their feelings for the parent with the gambling problem. It is important to help them understand that gambling is only one part of the person's overall behaviour. It is still okay to love someone even though certain things they do are upsetting. Children who grow up in a household with addiction have a higher risk of facing addictions themselves. Having the love and support of a caring adult will improve their chances of growing up healthy and problem-free.
